


A Somewhat Sad Story, I Suppose.

by somewhat_lost_anna



Category: Good Omens
Genre: GoodOmens - Freeform, Other, ineffablehusbands, soft
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-13
Updated: 2019-07-15
Packaged: 2020-05-07 07:25:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 9,807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19204669
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/somewhat_lost_anna/pseuds/somewhat_lost_anna
Summary: Adam Young, the antichrist and a dear friend of Aziraphale and Crowley’s, has passed away. Crowley and Aziraphale are living through plenty of sadness as well as attempting to create a happy life for themselves. They push through together and gain back their happiness while still having unsteady moments.                  Please do not repost without my permission or without crediting me.





	1. The Funeral.

They stood solemnly at the funeral, rain pattering down on the dark umbrella that was held above their heads. Aziraphale had tears in his eyes and quite the frown sprawled across his face. “I just- I cannot believe he’s gone.” Aziraphale managed to choke out, dabbling at his eyes with his handkerchief. “Mmh...” Crowley mumbled in response, sighing and peering down at the coffin that was now being lowered into the ground. Aziraphale took a step closer to Crowley. “Humans come and go, I suppose.” Crowley finally spluttered out, kicking at the ground. “It all went by too fast.” Aziraphale took Crowley’s hand into his. 

In the distance, three elderly figures stood. Pepper was proving her strength, holding back any and all tears that formed in her dark and usually soulful eyes. Brian was quieter than he had ever been in any of his years of living, staring down with a gloomy smile. Wensleydale had his glasses in his breast pocket and had obviously been thinking for quite some time.

“Adam was such a nice fellow. Even when he was the antichrist. I’d like to think we did a wonderful job as godfathers.” Aziraphale mumbled half to Crowley and half to himself. Crowley hummed bitterly. He was never good with mourning or grief, yet the alcohol at this event didn’t quite give him the punch he usually needed to get by. “Do you hear me, Crowley?” Aziraphale looked up at him to see tears streaming from beneath the black glasses. “Oh, dear. I miss him too.” Aziraphale bumbled closer, his forehead creasing with concern. “We don’t have to stay long, Crowley. We can go home whenever you’d like.” Aziraphale kept rambling, attempting to be comforting but rather messing things up more. Crowley did not have the energy to feel angry. 

“I can drive if you’d like-“ Aziraphale hesitantly offered. He got cut off by a sharp glare and a sad, sad smile. “That’s quite alright, angel. Just give me a minute more.” Aziraphale nodded and made his way to the Bentley, his chest heavy. He hoped to be back at the bookshop, cuddled up on the sofa with a good book and a cup of cocoa. He wondered if Crowley wanted the same.

Crowley strode up to the three figures and chatted with them for a while. He patted their backs before heading to the car. The door clicked as it opened and Crowley sat himself down in the drivers seat. “This is why, angel, I never bother making friends with mortals.” Crowley rested his forehead on the steering wheel. Aziraphale gently rubbed his back. “I know, dear. We’ll be home in no time.” Aziraphale ran a hand through Crowley’s hair and tried to get a good look at his husbands face. “Dear?” Crowley did not answer.

The drive home felt longer than Aziraphale and Crowley had been pining for each other, and the weather was forcing Crowley to drive at the speed limit. “I know you have something on your mind.” Aziraphale nearly whispered, the rain bouncing off the cars windows and creating a satisfying patting-popping sound. “Mmhhh...” Crowley replied with a slow and throaty groan, somewhat tired of his husband’s growing concern. “We’ll talk about it later, then? Before bed? After a cup of cocoa?” Aziraphale was licking his lips at the thought of the tingling warmth of a mug in his hand. “Mhm...” Crowley agreed in a sleepy, hazed way. 

They arrived at the bookshop where their parking spot had always been conveniently empty, almost like someone had created the illusion of a car in its place... Aziraphale helped Crowley out of the car and opened the door to the bookshop for him. “Go on, now, dear. Sit on the couch.” Aziraphale patted Crowley’s bottom gently and made his merry way to the kitchen.

Aziraphale brought two steaming mugs to the living-area, which happened to be right in the middle of the bookshop. “Crowley?” Aziraphale used his inside-voice, making sure not to startle the demon. “Angel...” Crowley called back. His voice sounded rather weak. “Oh come on, dear! Chin up high. I made you some cocoa and I’ll fetch your favourite blanke-“ “I want him back, Aziraphale.” Crowley felt his chest collapsing. “Crowley, dear-“ Aziraphale sighed, “he can’t come back anymore.” Crowley’s face looked drenched in shock. “He was here just a moment ago, remember? He invited us to his Christmas party, we went to his wedding!” Crowley argued broken-heartedly. “That was years ago, love.” Aziraphale handed Crowley his cocoa and sat extremely close to him. 

“Remember when Anathema died? You cried for days, dear. And when Dog had left? You comforted Adam with me. This is just another bump in God’s in-“ “God’s ineffable plan.” Crowley finished off for Aziraphale, sipping at his cocoa gently.


	2. The Night After Adam’s Passing.

“Things will get better.” Aziraphale hummed, leaning his head against Crowley’s shoulder. “If they don’t I may just take up the hobby of making margaritas with holy water instead of alcohol.” Crowley murmured darkly. Aziraphale’s head nearly jumped off of Crowley’s shoulder. The look of shock on his face was unforgettable. 

“You do not EVER joke of such things, Crowley.” Aziraphale huffed, his eyes wide as if he were a deer in the headlights of the Bentley. “Who said I was joking?” Aziraphale’s throat tightened. “Crowley,” he spoke in a shaking, fragile voice, “I-I don’t know what I’d do without you.” Aziraphale’s eyes clouded with all-too-familiar tears. “Hey, hey, woah.” Crowley sat up, the couch creaking gently. “It’s alright, angel, I wasn’t being serious! It was all a joke, I promise.” Crowley’s lanky fingers wrapped around aziraphale’s upper arms. He forced Aziraphale to look at him. “You can’t joke about leaving, not after all this time.”

Aziraphale was trying his very best not to let those bitter tears escape. His chin wrinkled as he pouted. His best wasn’t good enough, as always, and he began crying. Crowley pulled Aziraphale into his arms. “I’m sorry, angel.” He mumbled into Aziraphale’s neck. He heard soft sobs in reply. Crowley swallowed the sour lump in his throat. “Don’t leave.” A light whimper begged out from behind him. “I won’t, Aziraphale. I’m here.” Crowley had never seen his husband so devastated. Which was quite surprising to say the least, since they had known each other for thousands of years. 

“Hey, where’s my smile?” Crowley attempted the usual cheer-upping tactics. “It’s gone. You’ve lost it, it drowned.” Aziraphale whined. “Come on, now. Up to bed.” Crowley lifted Aziraphale up like he was a sad sack of potatoes. “Wait, Crowley, can you grab that book of mine-“ “Nope. Straight to bed with you, young man.” Aziraphale flopped down onto the bed. “You’re on my side.” Crowley nudged Aziraphale over with his elbow. “Does it matter?” Aziraphale groaned, rolling over like a tumbleweed. “Yesss, it does. If you have forgotten, I am technically a reptile and I need my heat lamp.” Crowley crawled under his sheets, which happened to be obsidian black. “Just miracle yourself warm, Crowley.” Aziraphale had his forearm covering his eyes from the glowing red of the heating lamp. “Just miracle yourself a new husband!” Crowley huffed. “Haven’t you learned anything from tonight, dear? I thought I made it apparent that I only have eyes for you.” Aziraphale rolled over to look at Crowley. He was closing his eyes. Feeling rather insecure about not wearing his glasses, he tried to turn away. “Nooope, no you don’t. Show me your eyes and I’ll show you a smile.” Aziraphale held back his laugh as Crowley’s eyes snapped open. Aziraphale gave his most angelic smile. “You’re beautiful when you sssmile.” Crowley whisper-hissed before pressing a kiss to Aziraphale’s forehead. They soon drifted off to sleep.


	3. A Day Out.

The sun had barely peeked through the windows when Crowley jolted awake with a hiss. He put on his shades and felt the coldness beside him. Where was Aziraphale? His bare feet patted the floorboards as he walked through the bookshop looking for his husband in his sunglasses and pyjamas. “Aziraphale?” He called out groggily. “Angel?” His voice was rough and grumbly. Concern grew in his chest as he began walking faster. “Aziraphale, this isn’t funny. Stop hiding.” Crowley’s forehead creased. He heard the scratch of a record that had been stopped. “Oh, dear, you’re awake!” A chipper, soft voice rang out from Aziraphale’s desk. “Aziraphale, you scared me.” The demon raised a brow. “Very sorry, Crowley. I’ve just been booking some fun things for us to do. We’ll have little date nights and such.” Aziraphale had written a long list of places to go and things to see, including all the best restaurants. “Sounds wonderful, angel. Say, aren’t you tired?” Crowley’s lips curved into a curious pout.

“Surprisingly, I cant feel anything! It’s quite pleasant, I think.” Aziraphale went back to scrawling down his ideas. “That can’t be good.” Crowley mumbled to himself. “Pardon?” Aziraphale looked up once more. “Nothing, angel. Where’s the first ‘little date?’” Crowley leaned on the back of Aziraphale’s chair, his chin rested upon angelic tufts of curly hair. “I was thinking we could go to the ice rink across the way.” Aziraphale’s finger dragged down the list. “I can’t skate.” Crowley admitted embarrassedly. “Oh please, you worked for that diner where you served food wearing roller skates but you can’t skate on ice?” Aziraphale reminded the demon of some questionable moments in time. “Mind you, I haven’t skated since then.” Crowley huffed and changed into his clothes with a snap of his fingers. “Still, it would be fun.” Aziraphale persisted.

“How about this,” Crowley took a deep sigh, “we just head outside and go for a stroll, hm?” They had been bickering for nearly four hours attempting to find something they’d both be willing to do. “Oh, why, that sounds lovely.” Aziraphale’s smile shone. “C’mon then, not much sunlight left.” Crowley gave Aziraphale a hand and helped him up from his armchair. The bell that rest above the door of the bookshop tinkled happily as the angel and the demon exited the building. Crowley jammed his hands into his pockets and looked over at the angel’s somewhat distraught face. “What’s wrong?” Crowley queried. “Well,” Aziraphale huffed, “it seems that you don’t want to hold my hand.” He pouted, his eyebrows furrowing upwards with an odd sense of sadness. “Oh, come on now, angel.” Crowley gave Aziraphale a stone cold, yet lovingly warm look. “I just feel very unloved!” Aziraphale continued to pout, which was his usual tactic of getting what he wanted from his husband.

“Aziraphale, you know I love you.” Crowley rolled his snake-like eyes. “Yes, but I don’t exactly feel it at the moment.” And with that, Crowley’s hands were out of his pockets. Aziraphale held out his left hand expectantly, only to receive a high-five followed by a smug grin and a cold hand intertwined with his own. 

“Isn’t this fun?” Aziraphale smiled brightly, peering curiously into every shop window they passed. “Mhm.” Crowley agreed, knowing he’d be spending money on Aziraphale sooner or later. He suspected the biggest receipt would be coming from the bakery down the street. Aziraphale couldn’t get enough of their lemon bars. 

“Oh, Crowley, look!” Aziraphale tugged Crowley’s scarf and forced him to look into a shop window. “You’d look positively wonderful in that outfit.” Aziraphale looked back up at Crowley’s eyes, or sunglasses, rather. The outfit displayed was a soft black jumper with a blood red undershirt. “It seems very... Aziraphale. Not very Crowley.” Crowley’s eyebrows raised. “If you wear it I’ll wear something you choose! Oh, it can be like a little game!” Aziraphale was jittery with excitement. “Fine.” Crowley hid a smile. “And no explicit clothing items!” Aziraphale added last minute, and Crowley’s mischievous smile faded. 

They walked into the shop and looked around. Aziraphale felt every texture he could, memorizing the looks and feels accordingly with the name of the fabric. Crowley looked in a mirror. “Excuse me, miss, where can I find that dashing outfit in the window?” Aziraphale smiled at the woman across the counter, who didn’t bother to smile back. “Over by the change rooms, sir.” She replied dully. “Alrighty roo!” Aziraphale quickly found Crowley’s size, he had memorized it the moment Crowley had told him, and brought it over to his husband. Crowley had picked out a sleek-fitting white suit. “Are you quite sure I’ll be able to pull that sort of look off?” Aziraphale swallowed hard. Crowley fumbled over his words. “Wh- uh- ah, angel, I’m not stupid. Go try it on, I assure you it’ll look wonderful.” Aziraphale bumbled into a changing room after handing Crowley the items he had picked out for his lover. Crowley simply went into a separate changing room and miracled the clothes onto himself. 

“Dear?” Aziraphale’s voice sounded nervous. “Yes, angel?” Crowley replied. “I don’t want you to see me like this.” Aziraphale’s voice was on the verge of cracking. “I’m sure you look fine, Aziraphale. There’s nothing to worry about.” Crowley stepped out of his changing room and waited patiently outside of Aziraphale’s. “If you want, you can see me first.” The door jiggled and opened just a crack. Crowley could only see Aziraphale’s bright blue eyes peeking from the crack in the door. “Oh, dear, you look perfect! Very soft!” Crowley smiles and spun around for his husband, showing off. “I suppose I have to show you, now...” there was a hesitation before Aziraphale stepped out. 

He looked very professional, yet he didn’t quite look happy. Crowley attempted to cheer him up with honesty. “Woah, look at you!” Crowley walked around Aziraphale slowly. He made sure to exaggerate while checking him out. “Is it really that good?” Aziraphale had turned around to face Crowley. “Yes! One itsy bitsy problem though.” Crowley took off his glasses and squinted at Aziraphale for effect. “And what would that be?” Aziraphale hummed. “It doesn’t feel like you.” Crowley put his sunglasses back on and smiled charmingly. He snapped his fingers and Aziraphale was back in his regular clothes, far more comfortable. You see, since the world had dodged its end, Aziraphale had been living far more comfortably. He wore a knitted jumper and a dress shirt underneath, hence him picking out a slightly matching outfit for Crowley.

“We’d best he going soon if we want to get to the bakery.” Crowley planted the thought of lemon bars into Aziraphale’s head. “Sounds wonderful, my dear.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time is nearly non-existent in this chapter and I am so sorry. I’ve written the entirety of this fic at night, and my brain is literally scattered and fried. I apologize for any continuity errors.


	4. Chapter 4

Crowley’s temptation had worked, and at the bakery Aziraphale was nearly pressed up against the glass. “I’ll have six lemon bars, three raspberry tarts, a slice of the chocolate cake-“ “Don’t get carried away, angel.” Crowley interrupted, placing a light kiss on Aziraphale’s cheek. Aziraphale mumbled in disappointment. “That will be all, I suppose.” Aziraphale sighed. “Oh, and one blackberry biscuit.” Crowley added. The cheery man behind the counter took the cash from Crowley’s hand and popped it into the register, much to Crowley’s dislike. He was never fond of paying for things, it made him feel less like a demon and more angelic. He shuttered at the thought of himself being as soft and squishy as his husband.

Aziraphale gladly took the receipt for his collection. Every time Crowley and him would go out to eat, he’d keep the receipt. Aziraphale joyfully took the box of treats from the man and they began their walk home. “Would you look at that,” Crowley said, nearly sounding whimsical, “beautiful sunset, there, angel.” Aziraphale walked closer to Crowley and grinned dreamily. Crowley’s hand was sprawled out across Aziraphale’s back, since Aziraphale’s hands were full.

“You’re quite right, dear boy.” Aziraphale looked up at Crowley with enchanting eyes. Crowley’s face reddened dramatically when he saw the soft glow that seemed to form around Aziraphale. He swore he could almost see his husband’s halo. 

As the bookshop became near, Aziraphale was getting tired. Another night in. Crowley opened the door for Aziraphale and took the box of goodies away from him, placing them on the kitchen counter. “Tea, angel?” Crowley called out, looking over his shoulder. “Erm- YES, DEAR, THAT WOULD BE VERY NICE!” Aziraphale used his loudest voice, which was proven to be quite quiet. Crowley let himself smile. He had come to love that sound. The echo it creating coming from the other room, the apparent struggle that Aziraphale had with shouting. It seemed all too familiar and safe. He was undeniably in love. He had this awakening every evening when he gets to come home with his angel or nap with him on the couch. “AND CAN YOU BRING ME A LEMON BAR?” His train of thought was interrupted by another weak shout from Aziraphale. “Yes, angel. I can bring you a lemon bar.” 

Aziraphale munched happily on his snack while immersed in one of his favourite novels. Crowley couldn’t help but to watch with loving eyes. “Mmh...” Aziraphale licked his lips. “I’m glad we stopped at the bakery, dear.” He said with a mouth half full of lemony filling. “I’m happy as long as you’re happy.” Crowley responded, leaning over the arms of the couch and slowly working out the knots in Aziraphale’s shoulders. “What’s tonight’s novel?” Crowley asked, leaning in closer to Aziraphale’s face. “You wouldn’t like it, I don’t think.” Aziraphale said, half closing the book. “Too lovey-dovey?” Crowley groaned. “Perhaps. It’s about a woman who falls in love with someone she knows she’ll never be able to please. The book is her constantly pining over him despite the fact he will not love her back. It’s quite sad, really.” Aziraphale said in the usual quiet, polite voice.

“Sounds boring.” Crowley said matter-of-factly. “Figured you’d say that.” Aziraphale smiled and closed his book. “Now,” Aziraphale took a comfortable breath, adjusting himself and sitting up, “what are our plans for tonight, dear?” Crowley thought for a minute before speaking up hesitantly. “Angel, have you ever thought about getting a pet? Like a cat, or a duck, or something.” Aziraphale turned to face Crowley, his face stuck in a freeze-frame of shock. “Why, I suppose not.” Aziraphale replied quietly. “I was just thinking... Perhaps we could use some company around here. And kids are such a handful, I mean, animals seem way easier.” Crowley went on. “Kids? Crowley, you thought about us having kids?” Aziraphale’s eyes lit up. “Yeah, briefly. 1700s or so. But now I’m thinking of a humble little creature that won’t get bullied at school for having two daddies.” Crowley shrugged and sat next to Aziraphale. “Ah. I see.” Aziraphale continued smiling, seeing how they could work their way up.

“We will discuss it further tomorrow, then? Aziraphale said, letting himself fall into Crowley’s arms. Crowley took a deep breath in, finally relaxing. “Yes, ‘suppose so.” He sighed. “Crowley?”  
“Yes?”  
“Can we sleep on the couch tonight? I don’t feel like moving.”  
“Yes.”  
The sun rose timidly from behind the clouds. It seemed that it was going to rain, yet Aziraphale and Crowley peacefully laid asleep on their sofa. As the rain began pattering on the bookshop’s window, Crowley rose from his slumber. “Get off me...” he whispered to his husband, who was, in fact, still asleep and in no fit condition to wake up. “Aziraphale.” Crowley hissed. “Angel.” Nothing was working. He gently slapped Aziraphale’s face and he woke up. “Crowley...? Did you kiss my face to wake me up? Oh, how romantic.” Aziraphale still glowed no matter the time of day. “Yeah, Yeah, totally.” Crowley bluffed. “‘S raining out there.” He said. “I can see that, dear.” Aziraphale replied. “How’s tea sound? Breakfast out?”

Crowley smiled. “I could go for some crepes.” He pushed Aziraphale off of him and stood up, snapping his fingers and straightening up his outfit. Aziraphale did the same, although his comfortable outfit didn’t need too much adjustment. “Please drive slowly, dear.” Aziraphale reminded his husband as they stepped into the Bentley. “Mmhm...” Crowley agreed in sort of a sarcastic tone. He started up the car with a wave of his hand and they sped off to their favourite breakfast place.


	5. Raining Again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, friends! It is currently the end of the school year. (Yes, I am aware that school has ended earlier for some folks.) I am absolutely exhausted, and as well as writing this I am working on an essay about beluga whales. They are very interesting and I would recommend learning about them. Extremely smart and cute, I might add. Anyways, I hope you are enjoying my story so far. Production may slow as I am working very hard in school and attempting to pass biology. I am also trying to be happier. It is not easy. But I am getting there and writing these little chapters has already brightened my mood. If you’ve read all of this, I love you. Thank you for the support.

The breakfast restaurant was run by Adam’s child, who Adam had skillfully named Kid. “Imagination is not needed for such things, you know. It’s like, why name something when it’s already got one? The dictionary is just a big book of baby names.” Adam would say. 

Aziraphale reminisced while Crowley pulled up into the nearest parking spot. Aziraphale had tears running down his face by the time Crowley had opened the door for him. “Hey, angel, why the tears?” Crowley squatted down next to Aziraphale as he sat in the car seat. There was a gloomy smile on Aziraphale’s face. “Just thinking of Adam.” Aziraphale wiped his tears gently. “I do believe I miss him.” 

Crowley held Aziraphale’s cheek in his hand. “I do too. But I’m sure Kid will be happy to see us.” Crowley helped his husband out of the Bentley and held his hand tenderly as they walked into the restaurant. 

“Azi! Crow!” Kid called out from behind the counter. Aziraphale’s grin gleamed joyfully as he pulled forwards, dragging Crowley with him. Kid had children as well, adopted ones. “Where are the tykes, anyways?” Crowley said. A little girl with curly raven pigtails peered out from behind Kid’s legs. “Crow?” She said, stepping out from her hiding place. Crowley squatted down to seem less intimidating, and the girl ran straight into his arms. He scooped her up while Aziraphale caught up with Kid. Giggles and shrieks rang out through the restaurant as Crowley spun the girl around. She was named Girl. Kid had learned a few tricks from his father.

“Where is Boy?” Aziraphale asked curiously. “Boy’s down for a nap. If he knew you were here I’m sure he’d bring you the book he’s reading for class.” Kid said as he sat Crowley and Aziraphale down at their table. “Oh.” Aziraphale smiled. He looked over at Crowley. 

As Kid walked away, Aziraphale whispered. “You’ve always had a soft spot for them.” He spoke softly. “For what?” Crowley popped out of his train of thought. “Children!” Aziraphale whispered quite aggressively. “Ah. Yeah, suppose so. Cute little buggers.” Crowley responded. “And you wanted to raise them with me?” Aziraphale’s face reddened ever so slightly. “Well, yeah, who else am I gonna raise them with?” Crowley scoffed, kissing Aziraphale’s cheek. “Some pretty woman. Perhaps an equally pretty man.” Aziraphale said, hiding a sneaky smile. “You’re a very beautiful angel, couldn’t ask for anything more, really.” Crowley chuckled roughly. “Come on now, you’ve had eyes for other people.”  
“Hm. Lets count. You, discorporated form. You, when we switched bodies. You, dare I say, gardener form.” Crowley counted on his fingers. 

Aziraphale scoffed and thanked Kid as he placed two plates on the wooden table. “Crow, can I sits here?” Girl’s tiny voice appeared next to Crowley. “Of course, darling.” Crowley helped her up. Aziraphale melted at the sight, his heart absolutely bursting with every breath he took. Aziraphale ate peacefully, watching Crowley and Girl carefully. 

“Dear, your food is getting cold.” Aziraphale reminded Crowley. “Ah, we have food at home.” Crowley insisted, miracling up a piece of white paper and some crayons for Girl. She clapped excitedly. Crowley flicked her pigtails, which happened to look like teddy bear ears because of her hair’s lovely texture. She coloured patiently, occasionally swatting at Crowley’s hands. And so Crowley got to talk with his husband.

“Hey, angel.” Crowley said slyly. “Hallo, Crowley.” Aziraphale answered equally as sly, smiling at the demon. “What kind of cat are we getting?” Crowley scooted closer. “Who says we’re getting a cat? There are plenty of animals that would better suit us-“ “You want something to cuddle and I want something to destroy my enemies with. Cats.” Crowley said. Aziraphale scoffed at Crowley’s reasoning. Crowley had no enemies to destroy, he was far too nice. “No cats. Perhaps a tortoise? They live quite long!” Aziraphale began pulling facts about reptiles out of his ass. Crowley yawned over dramatically.

“I’m finish!” Girl piped up. “Wow, lets see, then!” Crowley said. “He not get to see mine draw.” Girl said, pointing to Aziraphale. “Girl, it’s only fair if he gets to see as well! Don’t you want to show of your... er... hard work?” Crowley argued with logic, something a child of Girl’s age didn’t quite grasp yet. “Yes, but he does not play!” Girl argued back. So maybe Kid had taught her about logic. It was a 50/50 chance. 

“Azi likes to watch from a safe distance.” Crowley explained. “He sees, but only for two semcomed.” “Two seconds, sounds reasonable.” She held up the drawing to Crowley first. The look that blossomed on Crowley’s face was so stunningly proud, you wouldn’t even notice that he had a trace of evil in his blood. Or soul, rather. It was a badly drawn Aziraphale eating his crepe. Crowley chuckled quietly. Girl showed Aziraphale. Aziraphale’s heart melted like a candle in a desert. “Oh, Girl, it looks positively wonderful. Very good drawing, indeed.” He complimented her art. Girl handed the drawing to Aziraphale. “You can have. For your fidgeraber.” She said, smiling with a mouth of missing teeth.

Aziraphale finished his food, as well as nibbling off of Crowley’s plate. He didn’t want to waste any of Kid’s hard work in the kitchen. “Ready to head home then, angel?” Crowley looked over at Aziraphale quite lovingly. “Mhm.” Aziraphale answered, smiling back at him. “Goodbye, Girl.” Crowley scooped the child up one more time, kissing her forehead gently and putting her back down. Aziraphale crouched down and pet her hair gently. “Thank you for the lovely drawing, darling. We will definitely be putting it on the refrigerator when we get home.” Girl looked very proud when Aziraphale said this, pulling him close to her and into a hug. Her little hands tugged at the hair on the back of Aziraphale’s head. He smiled into her shoulder.

“Thank you, Kid. Lovely breakfast.” Aziraphale said, standing up. Crowley took Aziraphale’s hand and waved goodbye to the humble family. As Crowley pushed the door open, Aziraphale sighed. “You were right, that made me feel better.” Aziraphale sat in the Bentley. “The food or the folks?” Crowley joked, smirking mischievously. “Har har, very funny.” Aziraphale’s lips curled up. 

He looked down at the crayon drawing in his hands. “She’s sweet, hm?” Crowley said. “Indeed sweet. Like a lemon bar,” Aziraphale smiled, “both bitter and sugary.” Crowley began driving and Aziraphale held on tight.

“I was thinking-“ Aziraphale spoke through clenched teeth, “I may call the adoption centre tonight, dear.” Aziraphale took deep breaths. Even after 6000+ years of knowing Crowley, he still couldn’t handle the way that he drives. “Sounds fun. So a cat, then?” Crowley kept pushing for a cat as a pet. “They push cups over. And pee and such.” Aziraphale said, his face crumpling into a sort of disgusted look. “Every animal does that, angel.” Crowley replied. “Tortoises don’t... How do tortoises pee?” Aziraphale’s eyebrows furrowed. “Angel, call in, see what they have, and we’ll figure it out from there.” Crowley groaned. “Why, yes, that sounds rather reasonable.” Aziraphale mumbled as they pulled into their typical parking spot.

They walked inside the bookshop, avoiding the rain as best they could. Aziraphale shivered as he walked in, and Crowley lovingly scooped Aziraphale into a hug. A cheesy, romantic way of warming Aziraphale. He could have just miracled Aziraphale warm, yet Crowley knew that Aziraphale absolutely loves romance. So much so that he figuratively eats it up. Aziraphale did the usual ‘oh-I’m-quite-flattered’ giggle. Crowley pushed Aziraphale onto the couch and sat next to him.

“Oh, Crowley,” Aziraphale’s smile was gleaming, “I love you.” Something in Crowley’s chest twanged, sending a strange vibration through his entire body. For a moment he suspected he was having a stroke. “I- er- I love you too.” Crowley’s face was beet-red. Crowley had the same reaction when they kissed at their wedding. And when Aziraphale first held him. And when Aziraphale’s hand brushed his own. The same buzzing feeling rushed through every inch of the demon’s body and mind. It was a rather good feeling, Crowley thought. 

Aziraphale leaned over and pressed a kiss to Crowley’s jaw to snap him out of his reminiscing. He smiled and hid his further reddening face in Aziraphale’s chest. “A pet is a big step for us, you know.” Aziraphale said. “Suppose so. But I think we’re ready.” Crowley mumbled into the soft fabric of Aziraphale’s sweater. “Actually, I know we’re ready.” Crowley lifted his head to look into Aziraphale’s eyes.

“And how’s that?” Aziraphale asked, his head tilting. “At our wedding, as Anathema attempted to wed us you whispered to me that you weren’t ready. That it was too large of a step forward. Yet when we got home you wouldn’t stop admiring the ring on your finger. You’d give me this dumb smile. Reminds me of how glad I am that we’re still here on this earth. We won’t regret this. Nah, we rarely regret things we do together.” Crowley made his point. Aziraphale simply grinned joyfully and remembered the day they were wed. Crowley admired the dumb smile, as usual. That dumb smile belonged to someone Crowley had loved for thousands of years. He figured he’d continue to love that dumb smile for many years to come.


	6. Chapter 6

Aziraphale stood up from the couch. They had lost track of time and it was nearly night time. “You head off to bed, alright? I’ll call the adoption centre and see what they have.” Aziraphale smiled at Crowley, grabbing both his hands and pulling him up onto his feet, feeling every warm knuckle on his husbands hand. He brushed their wedding bands together and smiled softly. “Right, off to bed for me then.” Crowley said, pressing a kiss to Aziraphale’s cheek before walking up the steps slowly. Aziraphale’s eyes softened at the sight. He knew that soon they’d both be snug in bed, sleeping peacefully.

Aziraphale picked up the phone to call the animal adoption centre’s number, yet called Kid’s instead.   
“Kid! It’s Aziraphale.” 

“Hey, Azi!”   
“Being a single parent... It’s rather tiring, isn’t it?”  
“Well, yes, I suppose so. ‘S not too bad once you get used to it.”  
“Do you think... Do you think Crowley and I could babysit for you sometime? We... were just thinking. Of things.”   
“Of course, Az! I need all the help I can get.”  
Aziraphale proudly hung up the phone and grinned. 

He walked up the steps, listening to the whispers of the creaking stairs as he made his way up to bed. “Dear?” Aziraphale spoke out. “Angel?” Crowley answered. “I didn’t call the adoption centre,” Aziraphale said as he pulled his shirt over his head in their bedroom, “I called Kid. We’re babysitting for him sometime soon.” He put his pyjamas on and sat down on the bed. “Nice.” Crowley answered, half asleep. “Wait, what? Babysitting?” Crowley scrambled, sitting up quickly. “Yes! For practice. If we can care for a child then caring for an animal will be a breeze!” Aziraphale spoke with a sort of confidence that shone. “Aziraphale, children and cats-“  
“Pets.”  
“-are way different.” Crowley argued. “We’ll do just fine, dear. I promise you. You’re great with kids and I’ve been reading up on them.” Aziraphale said calmly, shuffling under the covers to get warm. “Alright, whatever you say, angel.” Crowley rolled his eyes and snapped his fingers. The lights flickered out and the redness of the heat lamp filled the room in a red haze.  
“Goodnight, angel.”   
“Goodnight, dear.” 

The next morning was slow and sluggish. After Crowley had once again pushed Aziraphale off of him gently, he groaned and shook Aziraphale to wake him. “C’mon, angel. Up we get.” He mumbled gruffly. “No thank you.” Aziraphale responded wittily, rolling over to face Crowley with his back. “Oh, wow, smart move by Aziraphale. But what’s this? I can lean over you and, Wow, look at that! I can see you!” Crowley was fluent in his sarcastic behaviour. 

“Go away, Crowley.” Aziraphale mumbled. “What? Are you mad with me?” Crowley’s brow furrowed, yet he kept his tone the same. “No! Of course not! I’m just tired!” Aziraphale kicked at Crowley. “That’s what all these women say to their boyfriends before they break up with them. ‘I’m just tired! I still love you!’ Bleh!” Crowley shouted out.

Aziraphale let out an ashy-sounding laugh. Crowley felt his soul melting joyfully. “Oh please, Crowley I’d never lie to you. Lying is a sin!” Aziraphale argued. “So you saying you’re not hungry and picking off my plate is a sin as well?” Crowley argued. Aziraphale chuckled again. “No, that’s called being peckish. Not lying.”

Aziraphale rolled over to face Crowley, staring into those yellow eyes intently. Aziraphale pressed his lips to Crowley’s sly smile, the aura of the morning sunlight surrounding them. The sunlight seemed to dance upon their bedsheets through the trees. 

After an hour or two of bugging each other and falling back asleep, the two finally got up. Crowley miracled them some breakfast, as well as adding the scents around the house to make it feel like he had actually cooked the meal himself. Bacon, eggs, toast with butter. “Looks lovely, dear.” Aziraphale said as he pulled a chair out from their kitchen table and sat himself down in it. The chair squealed as he scooted in closer to the table. The table was decorated with plates of food and cutlery, as well as a well-behaved plant. Crowley would choose one plant every week that would get to dine with Crowley and his husband. This week it was a small cactus that would prick Aziraphale every time he’d reach for the salt or for his water glass. Crowley growled at the plant each time Aziraphale would shout out in shock. “Little bugger keeps poking me!” Aziraphale said, obviously distraught. “Yeah, I’ve noticed. The bastard’s got a big storm coming if he refuses to stop.” Aziraphale swore he could see the spines of the cactus retracting into its body. “You’ve scared him!” Aziraphale’s voice sounded quite frustrated. “I thought I told you to quit shouting at the poor things!“ Crowley shrugged. “I wasn’t yelling. Just asserting dominance.”

The phone rang from the other room. “I’ll get it.” Crowley stood up and stalked into the living room, picking up the receiver. “What?” He answered impolitely. “Crow! Is it alright if I send Girl and Boy over soon? It’s kinda busy today and I can’t look after them.” Kid’s voice sounded remarkably similar to his fathers. “Yep, ‘s fine. Wait-“ Crowley pressed the receiver to his chest before calling out to Aziraphale, not knowing that Kid could still hear him, 

“AZIRAPHALE, IS IT ALRIGHT IF THEY COME OVER TODAY?” 

“WHO, DEAR?”

“THE CHILDREN, DUMBASS!” 

“YES, THAT’S ALRIGHT!” 

“-he says it’s fine. Bring them over anytime.” Crowley hung up without a goodbye.


	7. They’re Here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again. School has ended and yet I have a numeracy exam tomorrow. I am distracting myself by writing this chapter. Unfortunately, math is not my strong suit at all and I have an itching feeling that I’m not going to do well with my exam. Did you know Michael Sheen reads fanfiction? I hope someday he’ll read mine and laugh. Anyways, sorry for being so absent, stuff happens and my brain is rude and won’t leave me alone.

The phone clunked and clattered as Crowley hung it up. Aziraphale heard from the other room.

“Be gentle! The phone’s an antique.”   
He called out quietly.

“Yeah, yeah.”   
Crowley replied, sauntering back to the kitchen table and eyeing the cactus threateningly. 

“I suppose we’d best get ready for their arrival, then?”   
Aziraphale smiled tenderly and Crowley, who continued to stare down the plant before them. 

“What?”  
Crowley’s train of thought slammed on its break. 

“The kids, dumbass.” Aziraphale mocked Crowley’s words from earlier. 

“Ha ha, angel. Very funny.”   
Crowley scoffed, shifting his view to Aziraphale. 

Aziraphale couldn’t help but to notice the smile that Crowley tried to hide when he looked at him. He had a smug grin of his own, now. The main reason being that even a look at Aziraphale seemed to make Crowley happy. 

“I’ll get to tidying.”   
Aziraphale stood up from his chair, but Crowley pushed him back down. Aziraphale got flustered for a little moment.

“Angel, we can miracle it tidy. We don’t have to do it the human way.”   
Crowley reminded Aziraphale, his hands making the usual overly dramatic gestures. 

To Crowley, his body was a puppet. He could swing it any way he liked, be it in a comedical way or an attempt to look somewhat confident. He quite liked having a body. 

“Oh, well. I suppose I forgot about that.”  
Aziraphale cleared his throat and hummed shyly, staring down at his shoes. 

“I just feel that we’ve become so human in the past while. Going to the shops, getting wed. Feels like we’ve become awfully human.”   
Aziraphale looked back up at Crowley, who had the usual pouting lips and quirked eyebrow.

“I’m serious!”   
Aziraphale said, lightly slapping Crowley’s upper arm with the back of his hand. 

“Sure, sure. We’re human. It’s not like you miracle yourself a bubble bath every night or anything.” Crowley chuckled with a sly smile.

“I’m not the one who’s miracled himself rich.”   
Aziraphale pursed his lips together and raised his eyebrows. He felt a sudden burst of confidence. He understood now why Crowley found sassing other people so undeniably fun.

Crowley’s grin was wiped off. He huffed and snapped his fingers. The bookshop began rearranging itself to be somewhat child-proof. Aziraphale watched mesmerized as the books that he had messily taken out flew gently back into their place. 

“Right, that’s done.”   
Crowley said, taking a quick sip of coffee. 

“It would be rather embarrassing if we had forgotten to change out of our pyjamas.”   
Aziraphale pointed out to the clueless demon, who was still decked out in silk nightwear. 

“At least my pyjamas look cool,” Crowley grumbled, “yours have ickle birdie wirdies on them.” 

“They aren’t just any birds, dear. They’re nightingales.”   
Aziraphale pointed out grumpily.

“Whatever, still birds.” 

 

After they had changed out of their pyjamas and into their respectable outfits, Aziraphale sat himself down on the sofa with a good book.   
Crowley was playing music awfully loudly in the bathroom and tousling his hair. 

There was a knock at the door. 

“Dear?”

“What?”

“They’re here, Crowley!”

What followed Aziraphale’s words were a few grumbles and some curse words as Crowley walked down the steps.   
He opened the door and waved them in. 

“Kid, Kid’s kids...”   
Crowley welcomed. 

“Aziraphale’s just on the couch over there. You can bug him while I talk to your dad.”   
Crowley shooed the kids away with his hand, listening intently for the loud ‘Oof!’ That sound as Aziraphale got jumped on by two energetic children. 

“Thanks for takin’ them, Crow. Means a lot.”   
Kid said, his golden hair so closely resembling his father’s. 

Crowley paused for a moment as another twang echoed through his chest. This one was empty and dull, painful almost. He felt himself choke up. 

“Really, it’s no problem.”   
Crowley said, taking a deep breath and shoving his sunglasses closer to his face. 

“Thanks anyways. Children can be a handful. Especially as a single parent... I’ve really learned my way around things.”   
Kid flashed a quick smile.

He had dimples, like his mother. The hair of his father. His mother’s nose, his father’s eyes. He was all too familiar and the sight sent shivers of grief down Crowley’s cold spine. 

“Right, you best be leaving.”   
Crowley said, his chest heaving. 

“We’ve got things under control.”  
He shut the door on Kid and stood for a moment, trying to shake off these once-blissful memories. 

“Crowley, dear! Join us!”   
Aziraphale called out from the living room. 

“In a tick,” Crowley sighed, “in just a tick...”


	8. Babysitting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am aware this chapter is messy. I simply cannot give a shit currently because everything sucks and I am in desperate need of a good nap.

Crowley straightened himself up, if that was even possible, and sauntered over to Aziraphale and the children.  
Aziraphale’s brow furrowed.

“Are you alright? You’re making that face again.”  
Aziraphale pointed out.

Crowley had a certain pained smile he used to cover up his sadness. He’d scrunch up his nose and smirk mischievously. Aziraphale could spot that smile from a mile away.

“Nah, I’m alright.”  
Crowley shrugged as he bluffed and picked up Girl, who had been jumping on Aziraphale.

“Mhm. We can talk later.”  
Aziraphale gave him the serious eyes.

While Crowley had his emotion-hiding smile, Aziraphale had a certain look in his eyes. If you’d seen it you’d think you were in trouble by your quirky psychology professor. Although looking strict, they’re actually concerned eyes. You wouldn’t know that unless you were Crowley.

Crowley rolled his eyes and scoffed, spinning Girl around. Boy sat patiently on the couch, curled up next to Aziraphale. He enjoyed reading and studying instruments and such. His sister was high energy and bouncy, refusing to sit and refusing to shut up. Boy would only refuse to shut up when playing music.

“So, what have you brought, Boy?” Aziraphale gave him a soft, trustable smile.

“Ukulele.”  
Boy responded softly, unzipping the relatively small black case where the instrument lay.

“Oh, very nice! Will you be playing us a song?”  
Aziraphale clapped his hands together with an excited grin.

He looked up to Crowley who was not listening. He was dancing to a song that Girl had written herself. It went something like “Crow, Crow, Crow! Show, show, show! Snow, snow, snow!”  
And a few other words that relatively rhymed with Crow.

Aziraphale smiled to himself, his chest lighter than candy floss. Boy began playing chords on the ukulele that seemed to fit his sister’s awful singing and Crowley’s awful dancing. Boy had a toothy grin.

After the song had ended and Girl was laughing tiredly on the floor, Aziraphale clapped and cheered politely. Crowley gave a bow and a cheeky smile.

“Very good! Quite enjoyable!”  
Aziraphale chuckled quietly as Crowley gave a final spin and some finger-guns.

“Pew pew!” Girl shrieked out through laughter.

“That’s right, Girl. Pew pew.”  
Crowley nodded his head towards the child, who was now rolling around on the floor as if she were an ice cream cone being dipped in sprinkles.

“Mmh, ice cream.” Aziraphale thought to himself.  
A treat sounded good right about now.

“Shall we get lunch?”  
Aziraphale asked, checking his watch. It was around 11:30 AM.

“Sounds good to me. Girl? Boy? Where do you wanna go for lunch?”  
Crowley asked, picking up Girl and placing her back on her feet.

“I’d like to eat somewhere fancy.”  
Boy said, placing his ukulele back into it’s case.

“McDonald’s!”  
Girl screamed, back on the floor and rolling once more.

Crowley and Aziraphale shared an indescribable look of worry and confusion. The kind of look that would say “What do you think?” Or “How can we please the both of them without disappointing the other?”

They both understood ‘the look’ fully now, as 6000 years of staring at each other when something funny or strange happens had created a whole language of looks.

“Erm,” Crowley cleared his throat, “so what were you two thinking of eating? You know, sushi, chicken...”  
Crowley counted off food items on his fingers.

“Sushi sounds wonderful...”  
Aziraphale mumbled, thinking of his favourite sushi place on the other side of town.

It was a small, somewhat sketchy place. You’d enter through a door in an alleyway, and the service there was always welcoming and warm.

The distinctive feeling of love had loured Aziraphale there in the first place. He was so very glad that he had followed his feelings and discovered such a happy and private little restaurant.

“I’ve never had sushi,” Boy had his eyebrows tilting upwards, “what’s it look like?”

“Little rolls of joy.”  
Aziraphale provided his answer.

“Like babies! All rolled up in their blankets.” Girl had stopped rolling and was now laying face first on the hardwood floor.

Crowley was now thinking of baby Adam who, thinking back on it, did look like a little sushi roll as a baby. He grinned as the wave of nostalgia crashed over him. His smile was wiped off seconds after it had arrived. Adam was gone. Those memories had all rotted into an ocean of poisoned water and Crowley was dehydrated. And yet each time he had caught himself thinking back to those times, they had drowned him. Crowley’s stomach churned. He cleared his throat.

“Right. So sushi it is?” Crowley pressed his lips together. He tried to shake off the strange pain that nestled deep in his chest.

Aziraphale once again flashed him the concerned, full-of-love look. The look made the pain worse.

Boy hopped off the couch and Aziraphale stood up, brushing his pants with the back of his hands. He strode up to Crowley’s side and leaned in towards his ear.

“Crowley, my dear, would you please tell me what exactly is going on in your mind? You know you can trust me, right?”  
Aziraphale’s voice was gentle and relaxing as the angel whispered quietly to the demon.

Crowley choked. For a moment, Crowley swore he was about to cry. He held in his pained tears and took a painful, trembling breath in.

“Later, angel. We’ll talk later.”  
Crowley’s voice was rough and defeated.

Aziraphale felt his heart dropping. Crowley had struggled with his strong emotions for years and yet this seemed so off in a way. Somewhat different than all the other times of sour pain and regret.

Crowley always tried to hide his feelings. He was very good at it. Yet, as he aged, Crowley had let his defences down. For now he had a shoulder to cry on and someone to comfort him.

“Can we please get on? Come on, kids.”  
Crowley grumbled as he pushed the doors open. He had let his thoughts run wild, and a strange sick feeling tumbled through his being.

Aziraphale looked awfully concerned as he lifted the children into the Bentley.

“There we are, my darlings.”  
Aziraphale gave such a sad, desperate smile.

Aziraphale had never considered himself to be the type that pokes and prys. Yet he had an impulsive need to help others, part of an angels nature. Aziraphale would often begin bugging folks to learn how exactly to help them.

He cautiously got into the passengers seat. Crowley stared down at his hands, which were gripping the steering wheel with unnecessary strength.

Aziraphale took his hand and pressed his lips to Crowley’s reddened knuckles. He looked up at Crowley with glowing eyes.

“We can drop them off after lunch, okay?” Aziraphale sooke reassuringly, trying to catch a glimpse of Crowley’s golden eyes.  
“I hate to see you so upset, my dear.”

Crowley grumbled and started the car. The drive was incredibly fast as usual, and Aziraphale gripped anxiously to the seat of the car.

Crowley smirked mischievously as his pent up energy had unravelled itself in a fit of adrenaline. The kids shrieked excitedly in the back, Boy being less obnoxious and rather shouting with every corner and sharp turn. Girl took every opportunity she could to scream until her brain’s scrambled in her head.

Aziraphale was breathing extremely heavily by the end of the drive, and it took him a moment to collect himself before helping the children out of the backseats.

“Here we are, out we come.”

Aziraphale would mumble through harsh heaves of air.

Girl snickered at him and skipped along. Crowley made sure she didn’t skip directly into oncoming traffic and held her hand tightly.

Aziraphale showed them the sneaky door in the alleyway, looking proud of his little discovery. His smile shone incredibly brightly. If you’d caught Aziraphale feeling proud, you’d end up feeling proud as well.

Crowley held the door open for Aziraphale and the kids. Aziraphale flashed him a grateful smile and Crowley couldn’t help but to return with a smug look.

Crowley found it rather difficult looking any other way than smug.

A few of the waitresses and waiters waved cheerfully at Aziraphale. He waved back politely while seating himself at the usual table.

Girl scrambled up onto a chair before absently playing with the chopsticks before her.

“What exactly is sushi, Azi?”  
Boy’s quiet voice rang out from the seat beside his sisters.

“It’s like- oh its wonderful. And there are so many different kinds and combinations...”  
Aziraphale continued to rant helplessly about sushi before his husband, Crowley, had shushed him.

“Which should I try?”  
Boy attempted to speak over his sister’s obnoxious babbling.

“Whichever one you can pronounce.”  
Crowley joked with a grin. He received a light punch on the arm from Aziraphale.

The waitress came up to their table. She smiled softly.

“Your daughter is beautiful, Aziraphale. You’ve never mentioned your kids before!”  
She quickled jotted down their orders.

Aziraphale went beet red.

“Oh, they- they aren’t ours. We’re just looking after them.”  
Aziraphale explained, forcing an embarrassed grin.

Crowley was holding in a bountiful laugh. His face was also turning red, but only from the pressure of holding in a cackle. Aziraphale glared at him.

Girl looked up from the chopsticks she was swinging around.

“I wish they were my dads. They’re funny.”  
She giggled before continuing her little game.

“I quite like our dad. He makes the best breakfast.”  
Boy added quietly.

The waitress chuckled and left.

She came back not too long after with three plates of sushi.

“Enjoy.”  
She gave a small wave to Boy and Girl before striding away to the next table.

“Mmh.” Aziraphale sighed contently.

Crowley watched him eat, catching every little sound or smile. Aziraphale’s reaction to food was one of the world’s great wonders.

“It’s strange. Nothin’ like we’ve had before.”  
Boy said, nudging Girl with his elbow.

“Taste like FIRE.”  
Nothing that Girl said had ever made sense to anyone. Not a soul. She didn’t mind much. Speaking her mind was her favourite activity, and it didn’t matter if people understood or not. As long as she got to voice her opinions.

“It’s very unique.”  
Boy hummed as he finished up his plate.

Aziraphale had finished awfully quickly. He had always either savoured or devoured. There was no in-between.

“Right, we should be taking you lot home.”  
Crowley said. He had composed himself and was ready to open up to Aziraphale about his grief. He felt it would be easier without company.

“Very good idea, dear.”  
Aziraphale caught on.

Aziraphale had payed the bill and given quite the tip before leaving. He took the children’s hands before stepping out into the alleyway. They made their way back to the car, each footstep clicking with every step on the cement.

“Ready to go home?”  
Aziraphale asked, looking back from his usual seat beside Crowley.

The children nodded their heads and Crowley began driving. He reminded himself to slow the car down as they neared the little restaurant that Boy and Girl had called home.

“I’ll pop in and say hello.”  
Aziraphale gave a quick smile before exiting the car and taking Boy and Girl inside the restaurant that they had called home.

The children ran up to their father. Aziraphale got close to Kid before whispering gently to him.

“Somethings wrong with Crowley. Did you see anything strange about him this morning?”  
Aziraphale asked, fiddling with his hands.

“He rushed me out of the bookshop. He didn’t look well.”  
Kid shrugged and sighed as he took the children’s hands.

“Right, well, thank you! We best be on our way.”  
Aziraphale waved goodbye before rushing back out to the car.

He wondered what went on in Crowley’s mind. It had been a pressing question since the very day he’d met the demon, and now that they were married the question popped up very often.

Crowley would often laugh when nothing was funny, or look upset when nothing bad would happen. He truly was a puzzle that Aziraphale signed up to putting together as soon as he had said ‘Yes’ to the demon’s proposal.

He got back into the car and gingerly kissed Crowley’s cheek.

He still looked upset.

“I’ll tell you when we get home. I’m alright, angel.”  
Crowley said, swallowing hard before starting the car once more.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My goodness, sorry I’ve been so slow with my writing. Also, I started watching Sherlock. I have been doing lots of painting and getting myself out the house. And yes, the dogs are okay too. I feel as though I am updating an elderly family member about my life through postcard. You are all my elderly family members. 
> 
> Sorry for such a short and somewhat painful chapter.  
> I love you all.

The door to the bookshop slammed shut and Crowley dropped himself onto the sofa. He rubbed the flesh of his face with his hands and groaned tiredly.  
Aziraphale followed close behind him and sat down politely on his armchair. He felt it was best to give Crowley some space to breathe. 

“Ready to tell me why you’re upset?”  
Aziraphale asked, crossing his legs in quite the lady-like manner.

To Aziraphale, being lady-like had no effect on his masculinity. This was because, simply, Aziraphale was neither a man nor woman nor neither. He was an angel, and despite using masculine pronouns and labels, Aziraphale refused to put himself in any sort of confining box.

“If it’s about me finishing off that last bottle of wine, Crowley, I didn’t mean to upset-“

“No, angel, it’s nothing like that.”  
Crowley snapped, taking off his glasses and throwing them aside.

Aziraphale was slightly shocked and disappointed with Crowley’s somewhat harsh behaviour.

“Well that is no way to talk to your husband! You married me, if you get upset with me it’s your own fault!”  
Aziraphale uncrossed his legs and gently stomped a foot on the creaky old floorboards of the bookshop. 

“I have trouble envisioning what I’ve done wrong, Crowley, so if you’d just use your words that would help quite a bit!”  
This is as fiery as Aziraphale had ever been. He was nearly shouting, if that was even possible, and it gave Crowley quite the fright. 

Crowley sat wide-eyed. 

“I...” Crowley took a deep, unnecessary breath, “I’m grieving, Aziraphale.”

That was not what Aziraphale was expecting to hear. He was expecting to be shouted at, to be lashed at with words that would sting his throat for days on end.  
This hurt far more than any poison words could. 

“Oh,” Aziraphale looked rather shocked, “oh, Crowley, dear, you should have told me!”

Crowley was sniffling wetly. He hated this, looking weak. Especially in front of someone he admires tremendously. 

“Come now, don’t cry, my love...”  
Aziraphale stood up from his armchair and sat next to Crowley on the sofa, the floor creaking with every gentle sound. 

The only sounds heard were silent sniffles and sobs combined with loving hushes that escaped Aziraphale’s soft lips. The aged pages of the books surrounding them swallowed up the rest of the noise. 

“It feels empty. As though- as though I cannot feel grateful for the little things around me anymore. No smiling at cats that sit ever so patiently in windowsills, no admiring well-kept gardens with angel statues that make me think of you. No aged alcohol, no plants properly put into their place... Angel, I can’t feel anything other than this odd pain in my chest. This burning that makes me ever so nauseous. Please, you have to help me.” 

Crowley was now grasping desperately at the fabric of Aziraphale’s sweater, his head buried in the warmth of his husbands chest. His body trembled as cries resembling wild earthquakes escaped his weary mouth. 

Aziraphale’s hand was forked through Crowley’s hair tenderly. He was scratching lightly at his scalp and whispering ever so lovingly to the sobbing creature. For a moment he swore he felt Crowley’s pain. 

“Hush now, dear one. Skies will turn as the weather changes. The clouds will be pushed away by winds of hope and desire.”  
Aziraphale would whisper, pressing his lips to the weeping head that is buried in his chest.

Crowley continued to sob for quite a while before falling asleep in Aziraphale’s arms. 

Aziraphale expected this. Crowley usually had a good nap when things became too much. Aziraphale remembered back to the morning of their wedding, when Aziraphale had searched all of Jasmine cottage just to find Crowley in snake form sleeping in a mop bucket. 

Aziraphale performed a miracle, a book gently floating off of its shelf and into his grip. With one hand he gently pet Crowley’s head, in the other he held an aged book. The pages looked as though they had jumped out of an adventure movie, as if they were the key to finding a special treasure. But they were not. The yellowish stain was from a cup of tea that Aziraphale had spilt onto the book while dancing through the living room with Crowley in his arms.

The news was anything but comfortable. Hearing that your husband is plagued with the so-called ‘incurable’ feeling that is grief is not a satisfying thing to hear. None the less, Aziraphale held Crowley with all he had. 

“I’ll help you. We can get over this together, my dear.”  
Aziraphale’s voice rang out in a rough whisper. 

He wiped away the tear that strayed bravely away from his caring eyes and onto his cheek. He fell asleep bundled up with Crowley soon after. He supposed since he couldn’t move Crowley, he’d have to sleep as well. And that he did.

Aziraphale woke up long before Crowley, shoving his hand underneath Crowley’s chest to retrieve his pocket watch.  
3:00 AM.  
How unfortunate it is, Aziraphale thought, that he had always been the one to wake up first.  
He thought about getting up to make a cup of tea, or perhaps cocoa if he was feeling brave, but with a glance down to Crowley snoring upon his chest he changed his mind. 

He looked far more approachable in his sleep. His face softening ever so slightly, his mouth dropping open tiredly.  
Sometimes Aziraphale would stick his finger into Crowley’s pouted lips to wake him up. This often confused a very sleepy Crowley and prompted a very playful Aziraphale to let out a little giggle for once.  
He decided against playing this trick due to the scare of nearly having his finger bitten off last time. 

“Crowley, my dear?”  
Aziraphale’s voice was quiet and was soon absorbed into the pages of hundreds of novels. 

“Mmh?”  
A rough, exhausted groan softly erupted from the head that was laying against Aziraphale’s chest. 

“Ah, there you are. Sorry I’ve woken you at such a treacherous time, but I’m afraid I began feeling lonely. Cup of tea?”  
Aziraphale was now smothering Crowley with acts of affection.  
Little kisses on the forehead, gentle squeezes to the shoulders and lots of admiring smiles. 

“You speak far too fast. Didn’t catch a word you said.”  
Crowley chuckled, his voice rumbling like threatening thunder.  
Aziraphale thought that chuckle was the single most handsome thing he had ever heard. 

“Oh, why, I apologize for going too fast.”  
Aziraphale pressed his lips to Crowley’s. 

“Ah, ‘s no problem, really.”  
Crowley had a light blush on his cheeks.  
“Why’re you being so lovey-dovey?”  
Crowley asked.

“Well, before I’d figured you were upset with me for some reason. Now that I know you’re upset for other reasons I decided to catch up on the admiration I’d deprived you of.”

Ah. That was definitely an Aziraphale thing to do, Crowley thought. 

“So, would you like tea or not?” 

“That would be lovely, angel.”


End file.
